As many of you know, Mefloquine is the malaria prophylaxis I have to take each week to ensure that I don't get malaria and die. A common side effect of Mefloquine are the weird dreams or nightmares that occur while taking it, and up until a few weeks ago I had normal dreams.
BUT, last night I dreamt that I ETed, or signed my early termination forms. I dreamt that I was back in the States visiting and that everyone had thought I was going to ET and there was no way for me to go back to Senegal and continue my service. Even despite the fact that I really really wanted to and felt that I could stick it out for one more year. This probably doesn't sound scary, I'm sure. What, living in the land of T.V., cold (good) beers, cars, constant access to the Internet, ice cream....the list goes on. But, I was so shaken by this dream that I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep. The heat is probably getting to me AND I do live by myself, in a hut, in the middle of the desert...
This leads me to my next point. After giving it much thought, I don't think I will be coming home during my service. I am finally happy here. I wake up and look forward to the upcoming events that I have planned, despite the heat, power outages, and Senegalese men. I don't want to potentially ruin this good streak I've got going and I am quite positive that coming home would separate me mentally from Senegal and I wouldn't want to come back. I'm at a good place right now. I like my fellow volunteers, for the most part I like my village, I'm genuinely excited about projects, etc. This is fun!
I know I will be missing out on a lot of fun in the States as well. Namely everyone's wedding!! It seems like the second I left the country everyone decided to get engaged! But, I will be there in spirit. And when I get back next April I am having a big party, so everyone should mark their calendars now.
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4 comments:
Although of course I am disappointed that you won't be able to make the wedding, I'm thrilled that you're feeling happy, healthy, and settled. Definitely embrace and enjoy that feeling!
Looking forward to seeing you when you finish!
Awww. Well, I'm bummed, too, but your happiness is the most important thing. I'm glad to hear you're enjoying yourself over there. And that's a very mature and introspective attitude to have, so I applaud you for that.
April 2010, yo. We're going to party like it's 1999.
Except it will be 11 YEARS LATER! Holy shit.
To quote one of America's greatest poets, time keeps on slippin', into the future.
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